Okay, so I am single. Yeah, I know it's hard to believe after reading about how awesome I am through my blog. Ha ha! See? And a great sense of humor, too. It truly is a mystery.
But I think that I have come up with a couple of possible explanations.
One possibility is there aren’t enough datable men in my area. It’s true that Atlanta has a huge gay population which rules out a significant number of men simply because I am not of their preferred sex. Also, to be honest, I don’t think I really like Georgia boys anymore. It seems like any men that I meet and have been interested in, have been from elsewhere. Many of the single Georgia boys are clueless or rednecks. (The good ones are already taken.) But Georgia Boys, if you’re reading this, feel free to prove me wrong…or boys from elsewhere please feel free to prove me right, too! It’s all good either way. ;)
The other possibility that springs to mind seems to be the more likely one. Maybe guys just don’t want to date an outdoorsy girl. Maybe I’m viewed as too tomboyish. Oh well! All I can say about that is…Yes, men, I may be able to do the same things as you (I didn’t say better, though). I may be able to tolerate sweat, peeing outdoors when necessary, skipping out on makeup when I am sleeping in the forest, and touching the slimy fish I catch. I can start my own campfires. I can carry heavy loads on my back. I can pitch my own tent. I can drive a jeep over steep rock walls. And I can do it all without your help. But there is always at least two sides of every woman. And that other side of me, which I spend most of my time being, enjoys long, warm bubble baths, wears perfume and make up, shaves her legs everyday, complains about carrying my groceries to my downstairs apartment, and even wears thongs. Does that sound girly enough for you? If not, that’s just your loss because I don’t know how to be anyone else but myself and I refuse to try.
I finally realized this a few months ago. And I completely startled myself when I discovered just how okay I am with this. I have looked hard and tried hard to find that special someone and obviously that wasn’t working. I just decided that it’s not worth all the worry and hassle.
I am an active and fairly happy person. I live for doing things on the weekend and experiencing cool travels and adventures in my spare time. My life is pretty good, after all. One day it dawned on me that I was spending too much time wishing I wasn’t viewing a magnificent sunset alone or wishing I was spooning some hot guy instead of Best Friend on a chilly camping night at Grand Teton. Everything was perfect except for those thoughts spinning in my head. When this realization struck me, I decided to live to live and not live to find love. Love will come one day. Until then, it’s time to take advantage of all the adventure and fun life has to offer. I am going to have some awesome tales to share with my grandchildren one day! And to honest, I am the only person I know besides Best Friend that is living their life this way.
On my Realization Day, I decided that I was going to (finances willing) go stay with Best Friend in Utah for the summer. I did this in the summer of 2004 and had the greatest summer of my life, traveling all over the West, hiking, whitewater rafting, and horseback riding in canyons. I felt a flutter in my heart, much like that experienced during the first kiss, when it occurred to me that I should have another summer like that. I am so excited about it! Best Friend and I have so much planned that it’s almost crazy. We will see so much and do so much and really live. And to be honest, I felt almost happy that I wasn’t in a serious relationship so that I can do this guilt-free. I feel happy to know that I am not accountable to anyone else but myself. I can do whatever I want!
A couple of lines from Cyndi Lauper springs to mind…
Some boys take a beautiful girl and hide her away from the rest of the world.
I wanna be the one to walk in the sun.
Oh girls just wanna have fun!
I want be the one to walk in the sun this summer. (And chances are that out there in the desert, I will! :)
Does this mean I have given up on love? No. Does this mean I don’t want to get married? No. Does this mean I think all men are jerks? Yes…err I mean, NO! NO! (Just the ones I have met). What it does mean is that I simply am not intentionally going out looking for someone. I don’t want to try to make someone be the one. I refuse to settle. Being trapped is worse than being alone. My plan is to go out have one hell’uva summer, experiencing new things, seeing new places, meeting new people, enjoying every second of my life and time out there. I am going to enjoy not being tied down right now. I am going to live my life to the fullest until I find him. And when I do find him, we will live our lives together to the fullest. (whatever that will mean to us) Anyway, the old saying goes that you always find the one when you’re not looking.
That being said, I’ll probably meet someone this summer, get married in nearby Las Vegas and live happily ever after.
Guess I win either way!
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13 comments:
Where, oh where have you been all my life???????????????
well its really good that you keep doing stuff that interests you the most regardless of relationship status. a good relationship will likely come your way doing what you do - having fun. everybody wants to be with people who are having fun and are happy. so as i see it, yes you win in the end. instead of just sitting there sulking you are living life to the fullest.
and you really went after GA boys, didnt you? ;)
Girl, you're perfect the way you are. Those other guys were losers to not see it. I say there's nothing wrong with being a little tomboyish. Hell, I like it when a girl likes all the same things that I do.
So, you going to Utah this summer? For some reason I wasn't thinking it was this summer. You better be here for CM & Lala's birthdays.
Cheers to you, girl!
I'm in the very same boat and I LOVE it...I've been single for years and I adore being able to come and go as I choose.
I cherish my time and my life.
Good for you!
WOW HOT POST! Matched my status too ;-)
**And a great sense of humor, too. It truly is a mystery.
U know wut girl...I always thought why ppl like u, Linny and myself r still single...cos we seem to have it all but still missing something...but it's not that we r missing something...the Cyndi Lauper lyrics u put up just has the ANSWER! Terrific one that was. Cos we wanna walk in the sun and thats it! Most men I had r'ships with didnt like me doing that...so it was au revoir baby!
Anyways...having said all that, who knows what will happen tomorrow...u n I might meet the men of our dreams and get married, have kids and start taking em to kindy hehe..just like u said :)
Keshi.
I think the you need to find yoself a west coast guy, I hear they're the coolest. yeppers. also, it would help if you showered every now and then to get that wilderness smell off of you.
Tee hee - I loved reading your post. You are doing what a lot of us envy - getting outside, traveling, and HAVING FUN! My Sweetie likes to do all of the above, and I'm so excited to do it with him! Not many guys will tolerate a gal who doesn't whine about no shower on a camping trip, wears no makeup ever, will sleep on the ground and pitch the tent herself, pee outside, and eat hard fish jerky for dinner...let alone love and enjoy her. I am one of the lucky ones who found her "other". I think you are admirable, and have your priorities well in order~
Super Villain...After that comment, I think you have been replaced by Jedi Master as my favorite friend.
Besides you must like my "wilderness" smell since you can't stay away from me!
And aren't you the main one that picks on me for having to shave my legs everyday? You know most days I even take 2 showers!
Anyhoo, maybe I do need a west coast guy, but I'm not sure since it seems that the west coast guys I know are real punks....ZING!
(Finances willing) I would love to do all the fun things you do. The truth is, as understanding as Hubby is, he still doesn't agree to taking as many trips as I would like. That really is the good thing about being single (as you pointed out). Enjoy your fun-filled summers before you meet Mr. Right and he wisks you away to suburban mortgage lockdown (which, has its benefits -- they just aren't as FUN benefits).
SV, does Lala know that you can't stay away from Outdoorsy Girl? ;-)
Oh, and shaved legs are a good thing. Nothing worse that a girl with hairy amazon legs.
Have yourself a wicked time in Utah! I am jealous of that for sure. Maybe you can find a nice Morman guy to get together with.... haha.
I would date ya, you could carry my backpack on my trips.
Cheers,
Scott
Thanks Scott. You sound like a really romantic guy...allowing me to carry your backpack. haha. ;)
u must visit GOA, India ... if u havent yet
its a wild place
No u wont find bears here
but u will find wildlife here
a real freak out place
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