The Month of Love

I have decided to call it off. Valentine’s Day, that is. Yes, I am well aware that I have not the power to cancel the holiday altogether, but I can say that despite my New Year’s goal of inviting a nice guy out to dinner in honor of this day of romance, it ain’t gonna happen. Now don’t y’all go all You’re breaking your resolution, already OG? on me! Because I’m not! See, the catch is I said I would invite a nice guy out to join me, and with nice guys being nonexistent where I live, I conclude this contract with myself null and void.

I honestly don’t know what it is about this area, but I truly believe that it’s some type of black hole that sucks all the good available men from here and whisks them away to some unknown place full of happy girls and leaves all us nice girls here stuck with the rednecks and jerks. It sounds strange, but is so true. It’s the only explanation I have.

I don’t want to make this sound like some whiney, crybaby post about wanting to find a man, because I have honestly given up on that. That’s not to say that I don’t hope I meet the man of my dreams one day and to start our own little family. I still would really like that. The difference is I have stopped trying to make that happen and frankly just don’t care enough to fret over this anymore. What happens will happen. In the meantime, I am just going to continue being Outdoorsy Girl and living my life to the fullest. And then blog about it.

In subject with Valentine’s Day, I have always been somewhat turned off by the idea of a day designated for proving your love to someone by buying them gifts. It could be that I have never really had a great or special Valentine’s Day, but I still think it is ridiculous to designate one day of the year to be more romantic than the other 364. I’d be more impressed with a man who surprised me with something special on March 14th than the expected February 14th. Still, even though this Valentine’s will mean no more to me than last year’s (or the year before that), it’s not a total waste for me. I have used this time as a self reflection and contemplation event. Now I feel as though I have discovered the real reasons behind my being single. This is what I’ve got:

1. Men in Georgia suck. (As explained above)
2. I am a jerk magnet (including but not limited to liars, cheaters, wishy-washies, promise breakers, and no-callers).
3. Something about my appearance attracts only men who are too young (like 21) or too old (like old enough to be my daddy).
4. I am too tomboyish. (So what! I still look like a girl and if a man is too intimidated by the fact that I can probably do some things better than he can, then he is a pansy and I’m not into pansies anyway.)
5. I am quite possibly a man hater, as noted by some of my friends. (Of course, exempting my male friends, brother, and dad, who are fine examples of good men.)

Next, I evaluated the reasons why relationships I actually did have, failed. This is what I came up with:

1. Discovered that my significant other was a jerk (a cheater, liar, or was too wishy-washy.) And that’s cool because I refuse to settle for someone who lies and cheats. And wishy-washy people are too irritating to me because I know what I want and people who are undecided about what they want out of life are incomprehensible to me. And I cannot stand it when anyone assumes things about me. Assuming things such as I want things to be more serious or less serious than they are or that I will do all the same things his ex-girlfriend did, really ticks me off. I have my own brain and I don't like anyone to think for me. Never assume anything. I no longer wear my feelings on my sleeve. If you want to know how I feel, ASK ME. Otherwise, you're a jerk!

And that’s pretty much the reason behind every failure. I would like to say that karma plays a hand in such things, but I no longer believe in karma.

Karma is something that somebody made up to make you feel better when someone screws you over. You know that lame story… “Don’t you worry, girl. He’ll get his one day.” Bah! Hogwash, I say! Is that really supposed to make me feel better? And isn’t karma supposed to reciprocate the way you treat others, including the good deeds? Karma is supposed to be the natural implementer of the Golden Rule, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” You treat others good and good things happen to you. You treat others badly, expect bad things to come your way. Whatever!

If this were true, then half the people I know who are happily in a relationship wouldn’t be because they don’t appreciate their mate and either treat them terribly or do horrible things behind their back. Also, if this was true, I would be with a great guy because I have always treated anyone I was in a relationship with very well. Ummm, wait a minute…

Come to think of it, I wasn’t too nice to my boyfriend when I was 18 and broke up with him. True, he was stalker-ish, but maybe I shouldn’t have been so harsh when I broke up with him. Give me a friggin’ break, karma! I was just a hormonal kid! And if this one incident so long ago is the reason I’m being crucified when it comes to relationships then I’ve learned my lesson. Can I come down off the cross now? After 14 years, these nails are starting to hurt.

Like I said, this has been a great discovery time for me. I have learned that karma is a sham and so is Valentine’s Day.

BUT if someone would like to convince me otherwise, I really like dark chocolate truffles. Ferrero Rocher is awesome and I really like Ghirardelli Chocolate, too. If anyone needs my address, email me. ;)

Otherwise, cupid is just stupid.